DereonGoddess21

This week I’ve been MIA…I’ve got so much going on…I haven’t had time to come on and blog like usual…Yesterday and Today I did manage to get in my 2 hrs and 30 mins of working out ….I can’t skip on working out…B/c that’s how we fall off track and I’ve come too far to mess up now!!!….I know I’m behind on everyone’s blogs and what’s been going on……But, I will definitely catch up later on tonight….But, right now…I have to go……..Have A Great Weekend Guys!

                               (DAY 77 OSC)

Hi Guys…I’ve not been on-line all week…(Which is so unlike me)…..I’ve been so busy lately that I’ve only been able to workout 1hr and 30 mins each day!!!…When I “normally” get in at “Least 2hrs“…Oh and remember when I told you guys I was going to a Wedding in Feb…Well now I find out…That not only am I going to be “Attending The Wedding”..I’m going to be…”THE MAID OF HONOR”….So, all thoughts/hopes of just “Blending In” has gone out the door!!! ..She says that it will be a small Wedding and that we can wear any dress we want as long as it’s off white…I don’t know if I completely believe her when she say it won’t be many people there……B/c before when she had a “small birthday party”…200 people were there……..So,..I’m sure this will be the same way if not more….But, Anyway….I’ve already been looking for my “Dress” …I see one that I really like and it cost a little over 400 dollars…And, I know that’s pretty expensive for a dress that I will only wear “ONCE” but, this is a pretty big deal for me…Then I have to get my hair, nails and all the other stuff done…This is going to cost me easily over 1000 dollars…The way I’m freaking out you’d think it was “Me” walking down the aisle...lol….Well, actually I will be walking down the aisle….I know The Wedding is about the “BRIDE AND GROOM”…BUT,..I walk out before “SHE DOES”….And, I know… I know… once she comes out…The focus will be off me but,..I’m still freaking out…UGH…I’m so Nervous!!!…Did I mention I’m freaking out???….Ok…let me go and calm down…and catch up on Everyone’s Blog...Have A Great Day Guys and Thank you all for your comments last week!!! …

                                               (DAY 75 OSC)

I found out yesterday that I will be attending A Wedding….Where People That I’ve not seen in over 7 years…People that I’ve not seen since I’ve gained….And, I have to admit I’m More than a bit nervous!….We all know that black is very slimming …But, at weddings…You’re suppose to wear Bright Colors…..And, Bright Colors aren’t slimming at all..At least Not on me they aren’t……The good thing is the Wedding isn’t until Feb 10th 2007…..Which is 4 months and 17 days away….But, really when you think about it……4 Months really isn’t that long…And, the way my weight is slowly coming off…I’m kind of freaking out…I mean…The last time these people saw me…I was………..Well…..A..Lot,…. Lot… smaller than I am now…I was barely out of my teens…And you guys I know……I KNOW!!!…This is insane for me to even sweat this…B/c I am older and I shouldn’t care what other people think…But, I just don’t want the stares…You know???…..They don’t know that I had gotten up to 312 lbs…They don’t know what it has taken for me to get to “Where I Am Now”…They don’t know the pain and depression…The ups and downs that I’ve gone through….. just to get here at this size…When they see me they won’t know all of that…All they will see is a bigger me than what they’re use to seeing…All they know is what I use to look like…..And, I’ve been perfectly ok with my “SLOW WEIGHT LOSS”..B/c I know that change doesn’t happen over night…And, it took years for me to get all this weight on..So, it’s going to take years to come off…But, now……………NOW……………..I feel……PRESSURE!!!…Pressure to be smaller and to be thinner QUICKER…And, I know that “MY WEIGHT” doesn’t come off fast…So,…I’m just really freaking….I’m sure it won’t be as bad as I picture it in my head but…right now…I can’t seem to see past that…..So, that’s what I will be working on this weekend and these next up coming months……Getting my mind in the right state and ready to handle and deal with any…”Negative Comments or Looks that ”I WILL” get from people at the Wedding”…Well, to anyone who took the time….to read this Whole “Freak Out Rant” of mine…..lol…Thank You!……And Have A Great Weekend!

                                          (DAY 70 OSC)

Yesterday, I went to store after store but, still couldn’t find “My” Perfect Fit Jeans…They all had too much room in the waist…They fit my bottom perfectly but,…the waist looked like a holla hoop….…Ugh…So, my “Search Continues”…..Oh but, I did find my “GLUCOSAMINE SULFATE”…I can’t wait to start taking them…Although the pills are huge!!! I think I can handle it…I’ll do just about anything to improve these weak knees of mine!….….Well, I think I’ve already caught up on everyone’s blog who blogged this morning…But, then again it is only 11:20am…So, I’ll come back on later on today to check in on everyone!…Have A Great Day Guys!!!

                                             (DAY 69 OSC)

Thank you all for your supportive comments yesterday…I just really dislike having to deal with people like that…It felt good to come on and see all the support from you guys!!!…I could have really used this site 7 years ago….lol…but, I’m so glad to have you all now…  …….This morning…I went into my closet and after a 2hr search…I’ve come to the realatization that…..I have “No Dark Jeans” that fit!!! I really wanted to kind of dress down today…I was going to wear some nice dark jeans…a nice cool blouse and throw on a pair of heels…But…All the ones I have are too big…even with a belt…I guess it’s a good problem to have lol...but, I really wanted to wear some today…I guess I have a little bit of SOCS going on today… ”Spoiled Only Child Syndrome”…You know when you Want what you Want when you Want it….lol….…Well, anyway…I guess this means…I will be doing some serious shopping this weekend…It takes (ME) forever to find a really good pair of jeans…Especially with waist/hips like mine…My waist is smaller than my hips so it’s really hard finding a perfect fit…This is my second day blogging late in the afternoon…I’ve just been so busy during the mornings lately…I’m going to go and try and catch up on a few blogs before I have to jet out of here…Have A Great Day Guys!!!

                                            (DAY 68 OSC)

The other day I read a comment that Dan posted on someone’s blog…And, It makes So Much Sense!!!…He said, “Losing weight is more like a Marathon than a Sprint”…And, that is “SO TRUE”!!!..We all want to lose something “Every Week”…But, it doesn’t work that way…If it was that easy…We wouldn’t have so many overweight and obese people in this world…..I have got to tell you guys what happened to me a little while ago……………………….OK…..After my workouts this morning I went to the Salon to get my nails done…….And, an associate of mine was there…..(Now, mind you I DO NOT like this woman…B/c she is always, ALWAYS talking about everybody!…You guys know the type…The ones that smile in your face and time you walk away they’re already talking about you…Well, she’s one of “those”….So, anyway…I don’t know what made her start talking to me b/c all I did was sit down at my station to get my nails done…So, with this smirk on her face she just ups and asks me…SO! Jhonica what “Diet Pills” did you take to lose so much weight?????????….I was like???? Is this woman for real???…She can’t be serious!?!..With “Thomas” being here…Trust me!!… I was not in the mood for any drama…..So, I “TRIED” to be nice and,.. I forged a nice smile on my face and told her that I workout at least 2hrs a day and I just eat healthy…So, she says……………oh…ok…whatever then don’t tell me…Then under her breath she says… No one can lose that much weight that fast without taking “Something”……………………………………….I am telling you!!!...Ooooo…I really, really dislike people like her…Who just open their mouths and let any and everything fly out…Just no CLASS at all….I told her that my weight isn’t coming off fast..It is actually coming off slow but, that I’m ok with that b/c I know that way it will stay off…I told her when you judge other people ..You’re really judging yourself…When you have to put someone else down to make yourself feel good..It’s b/c you have low self esteem….I guess she didn’t expect me to come back at her like that…But, oh well…She rolled her eyes… got her purse and left out of there with a quickness...lol…As if I care…I’ll be darn if I let  her or “Anyone” put me down or make me feel Less Than…So, she can keep  on being a “HATER”…And,…I’m going to keep on doing what I do everyday…And, let my positive attitude about my weight…and my ”Slow And Steady Success”….. speak for itself!…I don’t know if anyone will read this since I’m kind of late blogging but, it was good to get it off my chest....Have A Great Day Guys!

                                                (DAY 67 OSC)

Thank you once again guys for coming through!!!…I will most definitely be going to the store to get some New Balance Shoes! I will also get the socks that Jo mentioned…I don’t know if they sell them in my area locally but, If not then I will just puchase them off line from the New Balance Site…The only free time that I have to really go and be fitted properly is Saturday…Which “FOR ME” is like forever away but,..until I can get my shoes I will just stay off my treadmill for now…I went months without it when I hurt my ankle so…This week shouldn’t be that hard..lol……Well, I’m short on time but, I’m gonna go and try and catch up on a few blogs before I have to leave...Have A Great Day Guys!

                                           (DAY 66 OSC)

Thank you Guys for all my “Knee” Advice!!!!!!…For the first time in years I feel “Hopeful” that I will be able to do something about my knees…The first time I had problems with my Knees was like 2 years ago…..And, I thought well once I lose more weight my knee problem will be gone…But, it never did  completly go away..I just stopped doing exercises that had a huge impact on my knees…How insane is it that I never thought of taking something other than aleeve to stop the pain???…lol..lol…...I was so clueless!!!!…But, thanks to Dr.Char the Hiker and Jo the Marathon Runner! I now have re-newed hope!...I would love to be able to “Hike“  or even ”One Day” run a Marathon..Now mind you… I did say “One Day”…lol….…..That will be one of my “Future Goals”……

I know I might be pushing it ..But, I need more advice from you guys...lol…What’s “The Best Walking Shoe”??? All of the ones I have now are failing me…Now whenever I do my 70 mins on my treadmill my toes get red marks on the side and on the top!!! I have 4 pairs of brand new sneakers and none of them are working out for me…My sneakers feel fine for the first 45 mins or so…and then the burning pain on my toes start….I know every sneaker doesn’t work for “every person”…But, I would love to know what has worked for you guys……Anyway…. Have A Great Weekend Everyone! And, Thank You Guys again for all your Help for my Knee Problem

                                              (DAY 63 OSC)

Well, I’m done with my morning workouts…and I’m so glad..B/c this morning my knees have been killing me…I don’t know why sometimes they’re fine but, then some days it’s like I need a knee replacement!…The crazy thing is when I was heavier I “Never” had problems with my knees…So, I don’t know why ”Now” they’re giving me trouble…Anyway…other than having “knee problems”…My morning has been uneventful…So, I’m gonna go and see what everyone else has been up to...Have A Great Day Guys!…

                                                                      (DAY 62 OSC)

Never in my life have I ever had support like this from people that I’ve never met…Never even spoken to on the phone…You guys are simply Amazing!...Even on my worst day you guys are here…Reading, Commenting and continously being Supportive…I can’t “Thank You Guys Enough”!!!

Today I feel a 100 times better than I did yesterday..This morning I got up early Worked Out…then had a really delicious breakfast… Later on this afternoon I need to run some errands…As much as I love the rain…I’m not looking forward to getting out there in it….So, hopefully by the time I have to leave it will have slowed up a little…For now I’m going to go and catch up on blogs……Have A Great Day Guys

                                               (DAY 61 OSC)